Piece By Piece

To run with arms wide open...

To embrace completely, without reservation...

To hold nothing back...

To give fully...

How does one do that when the memory of past
hurts takes your breath away?

How to give a complete heart when that heart
is broken in a million little pieces?

One piece at a time, that's what I've discovered.

And sometimes a piece falls.

But...

The fallen pieces are more valuable
than those remaining tightly closed in my hand.

A heart is nothing if not shared.

Check out project: 10,000 Reasons

First Day

The first day of school is finally ending for me.  It's been an awesome day, but exhausting since it wasn't over until 10:30 (an hour and a half past my school bedtime, for those that don't know). On top of leading an after school choir, teaching piano lessons daily, after school meetings, yoga, mid-week Bible study prep, programs for each grade level, volunteer opportunities, race training, my writing project, and any other random things that comes my way during the week, I've joined a choir on Monday nights this year. 

I know it sounds crazy to try to squeeze one more thing in, but I haven't sung in a choir since I moved to Dallas three years ago.  It's a part of a who I am, and I'm trying to save that part of me from completely dying.  After leaving rehearsal tonight, I am convinced I'm making the right decision to be singing again!  Rehearsal ran like a college choir rehearsal, he labeled my voice as "dark chocolate", and neither my vocal chords nor my sight reading skills are as rusty as I'd feared- JOYLIST!  Here's to Christmas music in the fall, musical growth and professional development!  I would love for this chorale to be my chance to dust the cobwebs off and vocally grow so that I might eventually audition for a professional chorus in the area.

My evening as a first day student went well, but my morning as teacher went even better.  As usual, I didn't sleep well last night and I had the jitters most of the day.  I have never been more excited about a school year than I am this one!  There are several reasons I believe this to be so, but one of those reasons is that I had a total life perspective shift this summer...

Nature Baby

This weekend was the last weekend of summer, so naturally I packed in one more trip to see dear friends.  My trip to visit was much overdue, and it wasn't until I saw them that I realized how much I've missed them.

Rosemarie, or Mz. Wag as I still call her, was my choir accompanist in college.  We quickly became friends and have been so for the past thirteen years.  She and her husband, Jim, are very dear to me.  The weekend consisted of catching up, good food, nature, naps, a movie, church, more catching up and more sleep.  It was wonderful!  I couldn't have picked a better way to end this summer and begin the school year.

The Waggoners have a beautifully landscaped garden, on the lake, complete with every animal, insect and bug you can imagine.  I encountered a family of deer on my morning jog, cranes inching into the water and a huge dead snake on the side of the road.  Hummingbirds graced their windows as squirrels lept through the trees.  Watching each of these animals made me feel very much a part of life, realizing how significant I am in my insignificance.

  As I sat on dock reading and writing yesterday,

I Dreamed a Dream

In conjunction with a writing project, I am also working on a compositional project. In college I dabbled with composing; I even took private composition lessons. 

Looking back, I realize that I never really put all I had into it. I took a lot for granted back then, and was an even worse procrastinator than I am now. This is my 10th year out of college, and hindsight is 20/20. I've decided to tap back into some of those dreams and talents I had before I let "life" get in the way.  

Getting today's mailbox treat was like greeting an old friend!!!  (Finale is music notation software for the computer.)

I'm Baaaaack!!!!

This summer I have single-handily failed at my goal to blog daily (A Day in the Life).  At the beginning of the summer things were crazy with my parents getting ready to move back overseas.  In the middle of the summer it was work and Bible study (Life Calling) that kept me busy.  The past few weeks travel northward stood in the way (you can see photo documentation of my travels on my Facebook page in the "August 2013" album).  And, we started back to school this week.  It's been a very full summer, to say the least!!!

All these were major contributors and are excuses to a degree, but the main reason I've been silent this past month and a half is that this summer, a good friend and I decided to embark on a writing project.  I wanted to take a step back to focus on that and get a clear direction from God, without the distraction of any other writings.  Stepping back allowed me clarity in several areas of my life.  As of tonight, my resolution is to resume my goal of blogging something everyday.  

My world these days, in bullet form:

Design on a Dime

At the beginning of the summer I began tackling a couple of remodeling projects.  In May I started with my balcony-  Man, I Feel Like a Woman.  My living room was next on the redecorating list.  You might remember my post in June with pictures of my mom and me repainting a chest "mermaid green" to go with the new look- Summer Break Has Begun.  It's taken me a little longer than anticipated, but I am finally finished with my summer project!  

I had originally purchased vintage travel posters from the 1920's as a focal point and theme, hoping to go with an art deco feel.  This proved much harder than I imagined.  Apparently, art deco has not recycled through the area in which I live.  Travel is my favorite thing on earth, and I knew I wanted to weave it in somehow, but ended up not using the travel posters.  I had to start from square one, but this ended up giving me many more options.

A couple of my friends have a great eye and were willing to help me finish up decorating, so this week we hit the stores and got it done.  I'm really pleased with the purchases we decided on.  I was able to keep a travel theme, tie in my love of birds and the whimsical and use the color palette I wanted to.  I used several things I already had.

Shout out to the "Design on a Dime" decorating team: Mother, Daddy, Karena and Karen.  I wouldn't be near as pleased with the result without any of them!  And, they didn't argue when I picked my St. Francis of Assisi figurine as my MUST KEEP item. :)

Below are the before and after pictures.  You'll notice that I changed out several pieces of furniture.  I loved the look of my old decor, but I was ready to personalize and brighten things up a little more.  Besides, I'm the kind of person that needs change every few years.  Note: The before pictures were taken during the day on my digital camera.  The after pictures were taken at night on my cell phone.  You'll probably notice, not only a difference in picture quality, but lighting as well.  I kept the wall colors the same, so even though they appear darker in the after picture, they are the exact shade as they are in the before pictures; the room is very bright.  You can click on any picture for a larger view.




DRUM ROLL, PLEASE...............

Hair, Hair, Hair, Hair

Two days in and I'm already longing for cold weather, fireplaces, scarves, and hot mochas!  I am not a girl that likes heat.  In fact, the only thing I enjoy in the summertime is the swimming pool and the ability to travel north and avoid the unbearable Texas heat.  But, enough whining.

Summertime is the best excuse for a haircut.

Week in Review 5.17

CURRENTS

Feeling: Like my allergies are going to kill me.  Excited that we are on the downward slide of the school year.  Ready for a slower paced few months.

Watching:  Last Friday I saw "Gatsby"- it was SO good!!! I don't often leave a theater, from seeing a movie based on a book, and think they kept the integrity of the book and its message intact, but I did with this movie.  It was lavish, edgy, imaginative, creatively used cinematography, showcased great acting, used contemporary music, had beautiful costumes, utilized color and filter to create mood, overall good adaptation of the literature and had nice special effects. It's a MUST see!  

Week in Review 5.10

CURRENTS

Feeling: Really good.  Happy with life. :)  Allergies bothering me.

Watching:  "Castle"

Reading: "Changing Gears" by Nancy Sathre-Vogel

Paper Tigers

Tonight I have been reading a book I just purchased entitled, "Changing Gears" by Nancy Sathre-Vogel.  It is the true story about a family of four that took three years and rode their bicycles from Alaska to Argentina.  I found out about this book from a blog I follow- Bohemian Travelers and it hasn't disappointed so far.

At the very beginning of the book, the author describes the moment she questions if she is up for an undertaking of such magnitude.  She describes lying in bed and asking herself the question,

Bach and Beyond

The orchestra members were warming up.  The persistent chime of the gong was calling music lovers to their seats.  Excited chatter was accompanied by the sound of scurrying feet coupled with melodic snippets.  All elements of the concert coming together for a brilliant opening.  There was only one problem.  The final piece, the conductor, was slated to appear in five minutes and seat EB7, at the Meyerson, was still empty.

Man, I Feel Like a Woman

Power Tools.

Potting Plants.

Two Trips to Home Depot.

Four Trips to Wal Mart.

DIY Projects.

Spray Paint.

First Time to Have Live Plants.

Yep, I feel like a woman today, or at least a real adult.

*****

Week in Review 5.3

CURRENTS

Feeling: On Wednesday, as I was driving home for the first time ALL day at 10pm, I called Kristina.  After about ten minutes of verbal ranting and childish whining, she suggested I need rest and "alone time" (I rank high on the introvert spectrum).  Boy, was she right!  

Week in Review 4.27

CURRENTS

Feeling: I'm still feeling a little worn out these days.  Working two jobs, trying to fit everything into my schedule, and having a personality that demands downtime is keeping me feeling exhausted.  My current bad eating habits are making it worse.  The weather changes are keeping the arthritis in my back flared up. And, this week has brought with it feelings of loneliness (not to be confused with feelings of "aloneness"). But, I have still felt happy in spite of the above.

Home Team

As I've sat here on my lunch break thinking about what I should write today, only one thing has come to mind: relationships.  Now before you get all excited about the possibility of a post about romantic relationships, don't!  At thirty-one and single, I would be safer writing about how to care for your twenty cats than about how to relate to the opposite sex, and I don't even own any cats. (see yesterday's post)  No, this is a post about people.

Present Day Bridget Jones

If the title of this post is confusing, then you were, obviously, not a young adult in 2001.  "Bridget Jones's Diary" is a movie starring Renee Zellweger,  Colin Firth and Hugh Grant, about the escapades of a single woman named Bridget.  IMBD's description reads, "A British woman is determined to improve herself while she looks for love in a year in which she keeps a personal diary."  Yep, that about sums my life up.  Well, minus the whole British thing- a minor detail. 

You're Gonna Miss This

The days left before my parents head back to Africa are getting fewer.  For me, this means as much weekend family time as possible.  

If you've noticed how often my hair style and length changes, then you will not be surprised to find out that I like change.  A few years ago when my mom was visiting the states, she and I gave my apartment a complete make-over.  That was about six years ago and I have the itch to do it again.  Next month we are going to completely redecorate my apartment and I can't wait!!!  I'm changing motifs, colors and furniture.  

Week in Review 4.19

CURRENTS THIS WEEK

  

Feeling

Happy

Week in Review 4.12

CURRENTS THIS WEEK

  

Feeling

Stressed.

Week in Review 4.5

CURRENTS THIS WEEK

  

Feeling

I'm feeling like this has been a particularly long week.