Life Calling

On Sunday mornings I lead a small-group Bible study with my friend, Karena.  In conjunction with our group, this summer I am participating in Priscilla Shirer's Bible study, Gideon, with the women's ministry at my church.  The theme of this powerfully written study is, "Your weakness. God's strength."  If you are looking for a good Bible study to do, this is it!

Last Wednesday night the presenter had us chart out the following: our weaknesses; our calling/God's purpose for our lives; what we need from God; and our goals (as they relate).  This didn't present too much difficulty for me.  I strongly feel that God is currently in the process of aligning things in my life for big changes in the near future.  I can visibly see how He has me training for plans He whispered to me years ago.  Because of this, these four categories are regularly in the forefront of my thinking.

This week I had to jump ahead a lesson, because Karena and I were given the opportunity to present last night's session to the group .  As we met to combine our ideas and make a plan, I started feeling myself being challenged by the chart I made last week.  
You know, the one I mentioned earlier that seemed like no big deal at the time.  God always has a way of humbling me.  This is only made better by the fact that this week's lesson focused on God's patience with us.  :)

For years I have been focused more on my future than my present.  Although this breeds discontentment, I think that it's actually easier sometimes to focus on what might be rather than what is, and that's exactly how I've lived most of my adult life.  This week it hit me like a ton of bricks- my present is vital to fulfill everything on the chart I made last week.  

Now don't get me wrong, I haven't been completely miserable the past few years, but I have gone through frequent moments of strong discontentment.  The main reason lies in the second section of the above mentioned chart- our calling/God's purpose for our lives.  I've felt specific callings on my life since I was a kid.  I am confident that there are certain tasks I was put on earth to accomplish.  Having both a passionate and impatient nature, waiting is not my strong suit. 

I get antsy.
I want things now.
Forget preparation and training, just throw me in the game.
That's how I've approached said callings.
But I've played enough sports to know that this is a formula for defeat.


This week, God showed me that I have been focused on the wrong thing.
I have been focused more on the "calling" than the "one who has called".   

As I think of all the things I feel called to...
the ways God has gifted me...
my talents...
what I'm passionate about...

I am being constantly reminded by God
that my primary calling isn't what I do.  
It's not who I am with.
It's not the jobs I have.
It's not the many hats I wear.
It's not even the people around me.

My life calling is to love God and worship him.  

This sounds almost too easy to be true.
Yet for me, the simplicity of this charge is so often masked in its complexity.

For years I have tried to nurture my relationship with Christ through my callings, when, in all actuality, I am called to a relationship with Christ and out of that relationship comes my purpose.

"And now, Israel, what does the Lord your God ask of you except
to fear the Lord your God by walking in all His ways, to love Him,
and to worship the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul?"

-Deuteronomy 10:12-